The number one most e-mailed article on the number one most read Western newspaper makes me…ugh… sad. I’m sad for the West. I’m sad for journalism. I laughed — and I had to stop myself from laughing.

In “Shanghai Is Trying to Untangle the Mangled English of Chinglish,” journalist Andrew Jacobs describes how ahead of the World Expo, Shanghai’s government is trying to clean the city of its mistranslations — its menus, maps, and signs with instructions that amuse Westerners rather than direct them. The article’s  accompanying slideshow is basically a bootleg version of Engrish, tallying off examples of bad translations: “the jew’s ear juice” (mushroom juice); “do drunken driving” (don’t drink and drive); and “execution in progress” (cleaning in progress).

(If you’re interested in seeing more, just check out the long-running Flickr group of Chinglish signs. And this site correctly translates, if you’re curious.)

How funny and new! Not. This article is literally written once per year by every major Western paper. In ’08, when I lived in China, I believe it was pegged to the Olympics. (Yup! And the last time the NYT did it, it was also the most e-mailed…) Media watchdog Gawker listed among its China cliches “to be avoided: Blade Runner comparisons, quoting taxi drivers, stories about Chinglish.”

Now why would Americans love to read about this? Let’s think long and hard… From what I know, American-born Chinese find this to be just another way to focus on China’s failings. (Though maybe that’s just my friend Ming? After all, Crunchyroll liked it...)

But I mean, seriously! How slanted is this? Whereas in the East, countries that don’t even use the same frickin’ alphabet make pains to translate for Western travelers — in the West, where are any translations? My boyfriend worked for a non-profit that was making sure that legal Chinese immigrants in New York City would be able to register, vote, and find voting centers in a city that has zero Eastern translations.

If Westerners don’t even try, how can they poke fun? While Americans are stuck still mocking non-native speakers who can’t speak their language, many don’t even study a single foreign language. Meanwhile, China’s perfecting its English… So maybe pretty soon we’re going to be outsourcing English. While everyone’s forwarding this around, just wait two years — the joke’s going to be on you…

But the article isn’t completely one-sided. It acknowledges that mistranslation isn’t only about scorn, it’s sometimes about the beauty of one language over another. In Jacobs’ article, he quotes Jeffrey Yao, an English translator and teacher at at Shanghai International Studies University, who showed that sometimes the mistranslation was a window onto the language:

He offered the following example: While park signs in the West exhort people to “Keep Off the Grass,” Chinese versions tend to anthropomorphize nature as a way to gently engage the stomping masses. Hence, such admonishments as “The Little Grass Is Sleeping. Please Don’t Disturb It” or “Don’t Hurt Me. I Am Afraid of Pain.”

Now, maybe they shouldn’t even be cleaning this up? Isn’t it so much prettier than plain old English?